Resolved some snares with a non-compete clause this morning. My soon-to-be old company has gone well above and beyond their obligations in ensuring that the transition will be smooth, and they let it be known there is always an available spot with the company should I decide this new line of work isn't for me. I will stay on as an on-call weekend emergency guy.
Signs are also appearing that the client, someone I thought I was fairly chummy with, was intending to sabotage this change as well. My boss let me know that worse comes to worse, they don't mind losing the contract over this change to improve my life.
If I ever again hear someone say something to the tune of "businesses are only out for themselves and their bottom line; the employees don't matter to them," I will proceed to tell them very nasty things about their mother. And beat them viciously.